I attended a blogging conference last weekend, a first for me. It was SOBCon ‘07 and the sense of community and affiliation in the room was powerful. It turns out that relationship bloggers hug as much as some mediators, and this bunch was just as good at creating meaningful conversation.
During one of the many excellent discussions between presenters and the 110 bloggers in the audience, Lisa Gates of Design Your Writing Life said,
In improv, the rule is to accept the offer and move it forward.
It struck me as really apropos for mediators, too. Accept what the parties offer you next, and move it forward.
What would enable you to do that?
Last 5 posts by Tammy Lenski
- The Agile Creativity of the Skilled Mediator - August 16th, 2007
- Woodbury Faculty Member Helps Build Bridge Between US, Arab and Muslim Students - August 16th, 2007
- Musings on Being a Mediation Road Warrior - July 19th, 2007
- Accept the Offer and Move It Forward - May 15th, 2007
- The Self-Conscious Mediator - February 27th, 2007
4 responses so far ↓
SOBCon 2007 Remembered and Recommended « Lorelle on WordPress // May 18th 2007 at 12:55 am
[…] Tammy Lenski - 5 Lessons from SOBs and Accept the Offer and Move It Forward […]
Nan Starr // May 18th 2007 at 1:04 am
What a great analogy, Tammy. Improv and mediation. I’ve done some improv work with young teens, and the biggest challenge is to get them disengaged from the script they’ve already written in their heads. Sound familiar? In improv, as well as in mediation, the trick is to keep yourself, and the rest of the “team” open for the pass (to take this analogy one step further). Our job is then to take that pass and run with it. “Accept the offer and move it forward.”
Tammy Lenski // May 18th 2007 at 1:15 am
Nan, I’m drawn to your language, “…disengaged from the script they’ve already written in their heads.” That’s what we do in conflict, isn’t it? We write a script, we rehearse it until neural pathways are created in our brains, then we “know” it’s The Truth. So mediators, in some sense, are charged with figuring out how to help people disengage from the scripts. Nice idea!
Roni Coleman // Feb 5th 2008 at 10:00 pm
To add to Nan’s beautiful idea of “disengaging from scripts” - before we can assist others, we as mediators must first disengage from our own conflict scripts. This is something Woodbury emphasizes with great consistency and patience for those of us in the beginning stages of our mediator-self development.
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